Passionate Afflictions
by AffinityFrequency
Summary: "I'm eighteen now, and I see my husband's brother walk up the steps to our house. He embraces my husband, after a gruelling time away from each other, and he looks over Stefan's shoulder at me. His eyes haven't changed. They meet mine, and I feel my knees quiver under my weight ... I know now, that without a doubt, I'm in love with Damon Salvatore." Set in the 1860s. Delena.
1. Prologue

**A/N: I don't know what you guys'll think of this. I like where it's going though, even if it's short. I'm not sure if I shall keep it all human or introduce vampires. We'll see. Anyway, read it and hopefully you'll enjoy it! I aim to please.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except my new-found addiction to TVD courtesy of my best friend.**

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_Prologue_

I'm fifteen when I first see him. His crisp, piercing blue eyes catch mine from across the apple orchard that separates his house from Caroline's. I don't think he even knows my name, but I know his. He is Damon Salvatore, his father is Giuseppe Salvatore, a close friend of my own father. He descends the stairs of his house, yelling at his father who is close behind him. Giuseppe calls him a disgrace to his country and Damon storms away from the house.

Father introduces me to Stefan Salvatore only weeks later. Though Stefan's a man made of wax, I can't help but sneak glances Damon's way every few minutes. The devious smirk that's chiselled into his firm lips never ceases to take my breath away.

Giuseppe and my father are both very political men. They work together, both members of the Founder's Council. I ask about Damon one night, when my father and mother are trying to explain to me that Stefan is becoming a businessman himself, and father brushes away the topic of the older brother with a quip at him being unreliable and not even being able to support his fellow confederates. I think about how ridiculous the war is. My father quickly changes the subject and tells me how Stefan is now able to support a wife and have a family. They then announce, after moments of silence, that I will be Stefan's wife.

I'm outraged by their narrow minded decision. I must have a choice in this. How can they force me to marry someone that I've said no more than a simple 'hello' to? Mother sees my scowl and tells me she's disappointed in me, and that I should be honoured to marry a Salvatore.

The next day I tell Caroline everything. I tell her how angry I am that I'm being forced to marry Stefan, and how my mother favours my brother. She would never make Jeremy do something he didn't want to. Caroline does nothing more than scowl and get angry with me for 'being so greedy'. I go weeks without speaking to her. She only got angry because she fancies Stefan, and I'm well aware of that.

Stefan and I see each other more frequently, after my parents relentlessly badger me. It feels weird. He's twenty-one and I'm fifteen. He tries to make conversation about politics and the war; subjects I'm not the least bit interested in. However, I want to make my parents proud so I smile at him and nod along to his stories. It's inevitable now, I'm going to marry him whether I like it or not.

I go over to the Salvatore's house quite often, and having forgiven Caroline I walk across the orchard to her house after my visits with Stefan. There are many times Damon will wink at me, or send me one of those teasing smirks, and it makes my knees go weak. Luckily my dress covers it, and I manage to smile back at him without seeming too childish. We have small conversations, when Stefan leaves the room, and I feel so natural around him. We talk about my interests, not business or politics.

One day, I feel very lightheaded and want to rest. Stefan leaves the room to get me some water. Damon comes in and seeing me upset, starts a conversation. I end up telling him about my horses, the only two beings that truly make me happy, and he mocks the whinnying of a steed. When I laugh at his impression, Stefan walks back in and stares Damon down until he leaves.

I don't see him again until my wedding day. It breaks my heart to see how happy my mother is for me. She wants nothing more than for me to be content with Stefan, but the honest truth is that I will never be happy with Stefan Salvatore. He's frigid, I think. He needs a woman that has no personality. Somehow, though, I say 'I do' and read the scripted vows.

At the end of the night, Damon holds my stare as I get in the buggy with Stefan. He knows, no doubt, that I won't be innocent after that night.

I'm trembling when Stefan takes my virginity. There's blood on the sheets, and once it's over he leaves the room and I sob into my pillow. He's not a pig. He was quite gentle, actually. I just wasn't ready. I wasn't ready for marriage, nor the responsibilities that go hand in hand with being a wife.

Damon leaves just a day later to join the Confederate army, giving into his father's wishes despite his own. He's gone for three years, until the war ends. Everyone is distraught that the Union won, but I can't help but look forward to Damon's arrival.

I'm eighteen now, and I see my husband's brother walk up the steps to our house. He embraces my husband, after a gruelling time away from each other, and he looks over Stefan's shoulder at me. His eyes haven't changed. They meet mine, and I feel my knees quiver under my weight.

"Elena," he says after Stefan lets go of him. He extends his hand, a small smile forming on his lips. I place my hand in his, and he leans forward and presses his lips to my knuckles, "You look beautiful." The heat from his words skims over my hand as he pulls away.

I'm at a loss for words. I shouldn't feel this way. I should love my husband with every fibre of my being... but I don't. I know now, that without a doubt, I'm in love with Damon Salvatore.


	2. Chapter One

**A/N: So it isn't very long but it's a start. I'm just getting the wheels turning here, haha. Thank you to the two wonderful people that reviewed. I encourage all of you to leave me your thoughts if you like this, because feedback is the best thing a writer can read. And it helps with inspiration for longer chapters, too. :D**

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Chapter One

_Diary Entry #672_

_I have been in love with Damon Salvatore ever since I first laid eyes on him. Unfortunately, the way things worked themselves with money and business, I was arranged to marry his younger brother Stefan. And I did, begrudgingly. Now I have been married to Stefan a little under three years. Two years and ten months, to be frank. I do love Stefan, I honestly do, but there is something missing in our relationship. He showers me with dresses and jewellery and everything that would make a normal girl happy. But I am in no way a normal girl. Mother always scolded me for riding my horses in an 'unladylike demeanour'. She obviously never has ridden a horse before, because side saddle is the most uncomfortable equestrian position out there. You can barely even trot if you ride side saddle. And also, most women will keep their lips closed when their husbands are speaking of politics and discussing the war. I, however, have never been afraid to voice my opinion._

_I really have no clue as to why I'm getting so flustered over Damon's arrival. I am married after all. Stefan is good to me. But Damon is_

"Elena." Stefan's voice breaks the dwelling silence of their room. Elena sends a glance over her shoulder before turning around, swivelling on her black vanity chair. She locked eyes with her husband, closing her diary and wrapping the leather string around it. "Why are you awake so early?" he asked tiredly, sitting up in bed.

"I'm not very tired." Elena whispered, tucking a lock of dark hair behind her ear.

"Are you upset?"

Elena gave a soft smile, forcing her lips to stay curved upward, "What do I have to be upset over?" she asked.

Stefan pressed his lips together, unsure of his response. Elena opened the drawer on her vanity and hid her diary under two other books, making it snug so it would be hard for anyone to see. She closed the drawer and walked over to their bed, getting in on her side. The left side; closest to the door.

Stefan wrapped his arm around Elena's petite frame and pulled her against him, pressing a kiss into her hair. "You haven't had any luck getting pregnant." He said quietly.

Elena froze. It was true, she hadn't gotten pregnant at all the last three years. Stefan thought it was natural, that she was unable to have children. She let him believe it, hoping he would never question. "Are you angry?" she asked tentatively.

"Of course not, Elena. I would like nothing more than a son, but if God doesn't intend for us to have children together then I can live with that. Maybe we should just... try harder." He gave a small smile, which Elena reluctantly returned.

What she was doing was surely a sin. The only other people that knew she didn't want to be with Stefan were Caroline, her age long friend, and Bonnie, another age long friend who just so happened to be the town midwife's granddaughter. Even though all around the United States dark skinned people were looked down upon as slaves or servants, almost all of Mystic Falls loved the Bennett family and treated them the same as any other family. Bonnie's grandmother Sheila was a nurse and midwife; delivering almost all the children in the town. When Elena realized that Stefan wanted children, she went to Bonnie and begged her to help. Bonnie gave Elena the only kind of birth control that her grandmother had, which was a diaphragm. Elena had been avid about wearing it ever since. Pregnancy was not an option for her. Not yet, at least.

"Maybe." She said weakly, looking away from Stefan's dark stare. She felt guilty that she still, after almost three years, wanted out of her relationship with Stefan.

"Are you sure you aren't upset?" he asked. Elena nodded and rested her head on Stefan's shoulder.

"Aren't you tired?" she changed the subject, her eyes darting around their room, "You were up past midnight, drinking with Damon." she added softly. She had purposely avoided Damon once he and Stefan got settled in the dining room. She was so happy he was finally back, and for that reason she needed to keep her distance. She didn't want to make Stefan angry by showing how excited she was of his brother's return.

He nodded as he lay back down, pulling her on top of his chest. She had to smile, seeing the playful look in his eye. It was the weirdest thing. She wasn't madly or romantically in love with him, but she still loved him. If she didn't, she wouldn't feel guilty about not being honest with him. Stefan brushed her hair from her face and placed a kiss on her forehead.

Elena slid off his chest and laid tight beside him, her face resting on his shoulder. The soft sun glinting in from their curtains made it all the more peaceful to lay still and think. In a few short hours they would get up and head downstairs to see that their maid Evelyn had prepared their breakfast, and Elena would face the challenge of speaking to Damon for the first time in years. When Stefan would leave for work, she would finally be alone with Damon. And that, the idea of being alone with the man that she was truly in love with, honestly scared her.


End file.
